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Would Anyone Like to Buy a Slightly Bent Flugal Horn?
Written by Mark Rickerby www.allpoetry.com
God, please save me from garage sales.
Whenever I see one, it just never fails.
I always have to stop and look around
at all the junk laid out on the ground.
Oh, the excitement! What might I find?
What treasures await? It boggles the mind!
It's usually worthless, but you just never know!
You might find an authentic Vinnie Van Gogh!
We've all heard the stories about some typical fool
who paid ten cents for some tacky, cosmetic jewel
then a week later, the same guy found out with a thrill
that it was Cleopatra's ring and it's worth twenty mil'!!!
Doesn't that make you just want to puke?
I mean, don't we deserve to have such a fluke?
It'll happen to me, though folks say it can't.
Someday, I'll score an original Rembrandt!
But so far, I've only bought stuff I don't need
like a mountain of books I can't find time to read,
old clothes that are already starting to fray
and old records that are too scratched to play.
I have tons of toys (though my kids aren't yet born.)
I've got a stuffed iguana and a bent flugal horn,
a velvet painting of Elvis that nobody can stand
and a baseball mitt that doesn't quite fit my hand.
I have a cymbal-banging monkey, an old tambourine,
a lava lamp, some hula dolls and MAD magazines,
a banged-up surfboard and a magic eight ball.
I've got enough stuff to start my own mall!
My den looks like the set of Sanford and Son.
I know I should stop but it's just too much fun!
Some people like neatness but I'd be in a funk
if I wasn't surrounded by cool, kitschy junk!
Searching through old boxes gives me such pleasure.
It makes me feel like a pirate searching for treasure!
It's prob'ly wishful thinking but I know that someday
I'll find something to sell for big bucks! I just may!
But half the joy of garage sales is passing the time
with old folks and children and neighbors of mine.
Just shooting the breeze like folks did in the past
is less common now that the world moves so fast.
I have no excuse. I guess I'm a hopeless case
but I run into garage sales all over the place!
My home's filled with junk. My family's in a huff.
I've got to have a sale to get rid of this stuff!!
SEE ALL OF MARK’s POETRY AND WRITINGS @ www.allpoetry.com and www.markrickerby.com
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